


Sweet On

by Xx_Mejjeje_xX



Category: Iron Man (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: A little angst, Aunt Peggy and Uncle Bucky are awesome, Baby Tony Stark, Bottom Tony Stark, Domestic Avengers, F/M, Fluff, Happy Ending, Howard Stark's A+ Parenting, M/M, Protective Steve Rogers, Steve Rogers Feels, Steve Rogers and the 21st Century, Tiny Tony Stark, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Tony Stark Has Issues, Tony Stark's life, Tony Stark-centric, Tony has a crush on Captain America, Tony looks up to Steve in his childhood, Top Steve Rogers, Winter Solider never happens, it keeps him sane, places every single Tony tag here
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-09-18
Updated: 2016-03-17
Packaged: 2018-04-21 07:26:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 16,564
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4820486
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Xx_Mejjeje_xX/pseuds/Xx_Mejjeje_xX
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A young Tony Stark always looked up to his hero, Captain America. His father, Howard aways told him stories until he stopped seeing his dad and a man named Howard appeared with a bottle of whiskey. Tony only had Aunt Peggy, Uncle Bucky and Jarvis to raise him. </p><p>"Aunt Peg? Whats Sweet on?" A little boy of five looked up to the women who smiled and kneeled down, Tony hugged his Captain America plush closer to him, "Its when you really like someone, Tony" she smiled fondly at the little boy and memories washed over her as she looked at the plush, "oh!" little Tony smiled as he looked at the plush and hugged it impossibly closer, "I'm Sweet on Captain America"</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Aunt Peggy is the Best Aunt in the whole world!

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Stitchyarts](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=Stitchyarts).



> Another Story incoming! This lovely idea was inspired and I have permission from stitchyarts on Tumblr to use, she's an amazing artist so go check her out if you love Stony, and love seeing a badass Peggy :) 
> 
> the Stories Title, Picture, second half of Summary and plot idea is all from stitchyarts. :D

 

 

Tony Stark was just a year old when Howard began telling him stories of a great friend named Captain America, a hero back in the day as his father would say and it was not until he was three that his Aunt Peggy Who also was friends with the great Captain America, gifted him with a plush toy of the Captain and since that day, Tony never let go of it he would always take it with him wherever he went. one could say that Tony looked up to the man as a Hero and whenever Peggy told him a story as well he would give her his undivided attention and thats a lot for a very hyper Tony Stark. 

His father continued to tell him stories that is until little Tony stopped seeing his dad at home shortly after his third birthday and when he did the older man had a bottle of whiskey in his hands. The little boy did not know why his father began looking at him with anger and coldness, lashing out at the child caused Tony to slowly lose his childlike innocence and began tinkering away at what little scraps of metal he could drag away just so he could see his father smile at him again. Every morning he woke up and look to his right wall there hung a Captain America poster and he smiled, "Good Morning Captain!" he saluted towards the poster and hugged his plush right when the Stark's butler, Edwin Jarvis knocked once and walked in, "Sir, Master Stark as told me to inform you that he will not join you for breakfast again today" even the man's calm voice did not match the way his jaw clench as Tony looked down sadly, "okay..thank you J" Jarvis looked at the young boy and hurried to his side and pulled him for a tight hug, "I'm terribly sorry sir.." Tony sniffed and shrugged, for being three he was a genius and he understood a situation even if he didn't want to, "its okay J..Dad is busy.. even if he promised.." 

He pulled away from the kind and warm embrace and quickly hurried into his enormous bathroom that was attached to his room by a door in the far left corner and quickly ran back out to grab his plush and ran back inside, Edwin chuckled and shook his head before leaving the young boy to wash up. it was much later that day when Tony built his first working circuit board and when the lights turned on he squealed and grinned as brightly as a little boy can before gathering his plush and spinning around, "I did it Captain! I did it! Dad is going to be so proud!" he grinned and hugged his toy tightly as he heard the front door and quickly gathered his project in his tiny hands and ran as best as he could to the sound of his father's voice, "Dad! Dad! look what I built! I did good!" he wanted to run down the stairs but thought better when he saw his little legs couldn't keep up and he rearrange his toy and project in one arm before grabbing the rail with the other and and slowly made his way down, he didn't notice another man next to his father, he quickly quickly set up the machine and watched as the lights all turned on and he grinned up at Howard with a hopeful look, "I did good, right dad?" 

Howard looked down at his son and sighed as he glanced at the machine and turned to the man, "I'm sorry James, my son is a handful. Tony get off the floor and go to bed" Tony's smile fell as he pointed to the board, " but dad.." " no Tony, and you can do better than that" with that the older man turned to talk down towards his study and Tony looked down, his eyes watering up as he looked at his hard work and picked it up and threw it as hard as he can on the floor, Edwin and the Man watched Tony with sad eyes as the little boy picked up his plush and ran up to his room where he looked up at his poster and sobbed, "D..Dad doesn't like me anymore.. what did I do Captain.. I've always been good.. right?" he frowned when he was met with silence and threw the plush on the ground before climbing onto his bed and hiding under his blue and red covers, not knowing that outside the man listened softly and stayed until he couldn't hear Tony's cries and he quietly slipped into his room and spotted the Captain America plush on the floor and picked it up only to gently lay it on tony's pillow and quietly slipped out and made his way to the study and found Howard once again drowning in another bottle of Whiskey, "Howard, stop this... you're killing yourself and hurting Tony" 

The older man rolled his eyes and looked up at his old friend, "we were so close James..we will find him" James sighed and shake his head, "I know you want to find Steve but its been to long, who knows how much ice he's under.. look I want to find him too but you can't keeping doing this, you can't do this to Tony.." "Tony is fine and I will not stop looking.. and if you're not going to help then get out" he growled and refilled his empty glass and James knew better than to continue. 

The next morning Tony woke up and looked around sleepily until he saw the plush he threw on the floor the night before and gasped, he quickly hugged it tightly and sobbed, "I'm sorry Cap..I'm sorry I didn't mean to hurt you.." he looked up at the poster and weakly saluted as he sat the plush down and sadly walked to the bathroom to wash up and once went left the bathroom and he looked at the poster, "you won't leave me..right Captain?" he picked up the plush and looked at it and hugged it tightly before leaving his room and facing the harsh day ahead. 

Couple years later, when Howard was on another hunting trip, or so thats what they told Tony he walked around the house until he found Aunt Peggy, he walked up to her and tugged on her pants leg, "Aunt Peg?" the women turned and smiled, "Tony, sweetie what can I do for you?" Tony shifted on his feet and asked, " Whats Sweet on?" A little boy of five looked up to the women who smiled and kneeled down, Tony hugged his Captain America plush closer to him, "Its when you really like someone, Tony" she smiled fondly at the little boy and memories washed over her as she looked at the plush, "oh!" little Tony smiled as he looked at the plush and hugged it impossibly closer, "I'm Sweet on Captain America" Peggy laughed softly and pulled Tony in for a tight hug, "oh Tony" he softly whispers, Tony noticed the tears in her eyes and tilted his head, "did I say something wrong Aunt Peggy?" she shook her head and smiled, "no Tony, my sweet Tony.. you really like Captain, don't you?" the little boy nodded and smiled as Peggy smiled too, "always hold onto that okay Tony? no matter how sad you are, Captain America will always be with you okay?" Tony nodded and smiled, "I'm never sad Aunt Peg, Cap is always with me.. I'm never alone" she smiled and nodded, "I'm sure Cap would like you too Tony" 

Before Tony could say anything he heard the door open and his father walked in with the same man, James again he advert his gaze from his father and looked at his plush, now he knew better than to look at his father, well his father he knew did, the man in front of him was a stranger and every day he just seemed to get angrier and meaner but Tony learned to block it off, James or Uncle Bucky as he was asked to be called was really nice he said he was also Captain's old friend but he didn't believe him, Bucky looked too young to be from the same time, even Aunt Peggy started to have grey hair covering her head, it was impossible. 

"Tony what are you doing here? get out of here, you're not suppose to be here" Howard angrily pushed Tony aside as Tony stumbled and fell, he stared at the ground and said nothing as he stood, he learned to not cry in front of Howard, he learned that he was just a nuisance as he heard his father call him that once and before he lost himself in his head, a pair of strong arms picked him up and he looked up to see it was Bucky and Peggy looked at Howard angrily, "How dare you treat your son like that, Howard? you're better than that the man Steve, James and I met was far better than the man now and if I could I would have thought you a lesson. Tony is just a boy and I swear I you ever hurt him and yell at him one more time I will show you who Peggy Carter really is, or did you forget that day in your lab when you were showing Steve his shield designs. Thats my only warning" She huffed and turned to drag Bucky with Tony away, "Aunt Peggy is awesome.." Tony whispered in awe as Bucky laughed, "she sure is, buddy" 


	2. Family Doesn't End in Blood

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Howard is a Dick. Aunt Peggy tries hard not to punch his face and Jarvis, Bucky are awesome people.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ah at last another chapter I do apologize for the late updates, having internet problems and well i keep getting headaches but i just wonder if its cause i'm starting to panic over my flight on Saturday lol I hate flying. 
> 
> Anyways, I did try to separate the dialogue as much as I can, hopefully its not messy. 
> 
>  
> 
> Warning: Child abuse (mentally and physically) towards the end. gee I wonder who is the abuser >.>
> 
> Note: if you have noticed Maria Stark isn't in this story, well thats because this is Tony's story and you can probably figure out that he never sees his mother. baby Tony needs hugs.

Tony was a very bright child as he grew up, He was eager to attend school like other children he had seen from his window, it faced towards the street and he could see every morning the group of school children in their uniforms walking towards the prestigious school that was located down the road from the Stark Mansion. After asking, he wouldn’t admit he begged a little he was allowed to go under one condition that he could stay one year, that in a year he is going to realize how horrible semi public school is and he will instead tutored.

As the new school year started, Tony bounced on his feet excitingly as Jarvis adjusted his uniform’s vest and helped the young boy slip on his backpack, neatly tucked inside was his Captain America plush and his lunch and before Jarvis could tell the young boy to be careful, Tony bolted out the door and out through the main gates, his big brown eyes wide at his new surroundings, everything looked different from his new point of view and he couldn’t help but smile widely and causing a group of boys to look at him funny.

Tony froze and quickly looked down when the group started to whisper and Tony had to walk away as quickly as his little legs could take him, he knew whispering and pointing at someone wasn’t a good sign and Tony mentally smacked himself and telling himself to focus on not messing up, Howard had warned him the night before that if he slipped up he would be in serious trouble.

Sighing, Tony kept his excitement in check as he looked around at all of the buildings that surrounded him, and after what seemed like a very long time he arrived at the school’s gates, he looked around not knowing what to do before he followed a group of children around his age, thankfully inside there was a large board filled with papers and children huddle around it, looking for their names and their classrooms. All of the children, minus Tony that were their kindergarten years had to find an adult to help them find their classroom but course Tony was Tony and he already learned how to read, not perfectly but his Aunt Peggy showed him everything and he leaned quickly, he squeezed through a group of older kids and he looked up at the board.

After standing on his tip toes and craning his neck as far as he could he located his name and next to his a combination of numbers and letters, Uncle Bucky taught him how to count, it was easier than the alphabet and he hurriedly went to find the room that matched the the ones next to his name. Once he found it he saw his fellow classmates standing around a teacher and he smiled, he couldn’t wait to make new friends outside his family, closing his eyes and thinking back to his poster on his wall and his plush in his backpack he found the courage to walk up to a girl and wave,

“Hi! I’m Ton..” he was cut off by the girl who frowned,

“ You are Anthony Stark..Mommy said not to talk to you.. she said that Starks are too good for the rest of the world”

Tony frowned and looked at the girl confusingly, he understood her, knew what she meant and it hurt, he wanted to make friends away from the Stark name but as he looked at the rest of his classmates they all seemed to stay clear of him, he swallowed the lump in his throat and looked at the teacher who looked at him the same why other adults looked at his father.

He was the last one to follow the group inside the classrooms and the children all ran to sit at the round tables, all of them talking excitingly to each other and Tony felt more alone and unwanted, he looked up at the teacher who looked at him with the faintest expression of pity and Tony frowned and looked down, “Mr. Stark there is a table in the back..”

“My name is Tony..” he whispered as he made his way to the table, the whispers and finger pointing did not end until he sat down and the teacher cleared his throat to beginning the lesson.

Tony must have zoned out half way through the ‘let’s learn the alphabet’ and he blinked and looked up at the teacher who looked at him with a raised eyebrow, looking back down at the table he saw it was covered in drawings, designs for new inventions, things Tony wanted to build but he was still too young and useless and before the teacher, he forgot her name already, could have snatched his drawings away he held out his completed work and continued his drawings.

\- - - - - - - 

It wasn’t until half way into the school year that Tony got into his first fight. Everyday he would take his Captain plush to school, keeping it in his backpack and taking it out only once every other children fell asleep during nap time but today he dared take him out during recess and everyone was outside playing, he always sat at the big tables and laid out his drawings, “Cap, its almost done.. when i’m bigger i’ll build this cool robot! “ he smiled proudly at his work until a voice was heard near him.

“Look its the freak talking to himself!” a chorus of laughter was heard and Tony didn’t need to look up to see it was Zeke a boy in the third grade, and the school’s bully, They (his grade and Tony’s) shared a common area for recess and Tony always tried to stay away from everyone else, “Hey, I’m talking to you, freak “ Zeke called out to him and Tony only looked up when a hand snatched his plush away.

“Hey! Give it back!”

“Come and take your fake hero back” he sneered as his group laughed.

“Take it back! Captain America isn’t fake, he's real!” Tony yelled as he tried to reach for his plush but Zeke kept it out of reach.

“He’s fake, Captain America is no hero..he isn’t real you’re so stupid Tony, my dad was right” he smirked as Tony froze.

“I..I’m not..” he was cut off by laughter,

“Yes you are, my father said Howard thinks you’re useless to him, that you will never be a Stark and he blames himself for having a stupid son like you” his smirk grew wider as Tony’s eyes began to water.

“Are you going to cry? look at him he’s a baby! Howard is right, you will never be like him just look at the trash you’re drawing and you even believe in a stupid toy that isn’t real and its stupid like you…”

Tony had enough and he lounged forward with all his strength and tackled Zeke to the ground and threw a punch to his face he reached out to grab his Captain but Zeke threw it to the ground and his group of friends began to kick it around the dirt, Tony screamed and began throwing punches and kicks at anything that moved to get to his plush, tears streaming down his face until a group of teachers broke up the fight and pulled both Zeke and Tony to the Principals office.

\- - - - - - - 

Tony didn’t know what was worse, his father’s anger at home or the anger he could feel now, he sat in the car on the way back as still and quiet as he can while hugging his now dirty plush and drawings close to his chest, he didn’t want to go home.

Howard roughly grabbed Tony by his arm as they walked inside the mansion and to his study, Tony saw Aunt Peggy, Uncle Bucky and Jarvis looked at Howard angrily as he practically threw the little boy into the room, “You stupid boy!” Tony flinched as he looked down at the floor, “You look at me when I speak to you!” Howard screamed as Tony forced his head up.

“You are a disgrace to this name! do you even know what you have done?! You pulled me from my work and to what? find out you dared punch the son of a dear friend of mine?! Stupid boy!” Tony tried hard to not tear up but it was hard when his father was screaming at him even worse when a hand came down against his cheek and he tried hard not to fall.

“Don’t you dare cry, no son of mine cries or they are not worth the name of Stark! Give me that!” Howard yelled, his breath smelled funny like the drinks he always drank and Tony had to flinch away until his father yanked his only source of comfort from his arms, he made all the drawings fall and Tony didn’t have the strength to pick them up, “You fought the boy over this?” Tony could see the anger as Howard looked at the plush and threw it away and picked up the drawings,

“And this? what garbage is this?! Trash, all of it! (he ripped the papers) and here I thought you inherited the Starks.. “ he was cut off by the studies door flying open and Peggy storming inside and one look at Tony’s tear stained and large red mark on the boys face when her anger made even Howard flinch.

“How dare you!” she began as Bucky slipped inside and picked Tony up tightly in his arms, Jarvis was already picking up all of the ripped papers as Bucky quickly left the room when he heard Peggy say, “What would Steve say when he says the person you become?!” he also heard a slap but he wasn’t sure, he was still frozen and his small hand rested against his throbbing cheek when a wave of sadness washed over him and tears once again fell.

“Tony… “ Bucky started but sighed and just held the boy close, Tony closed his eyes and sobbed quietly against his uncle’s shoulders as Jarvis walked into his room, when did he get there? oh well. and gently set his plush in his arms it still had dirt stains but must were cleaned off and his drawings were tapped back together, Tony sniffed and looked at Jarvis who had a soft and sad expression, “Sir.. I’m terribly sorry, I got everything that I could of the dirt out and tapped your wonderful drawings together” Tony whined and shook his head as he wrapped his arms around his favorite toy, “they’re not wonderful.. father said..”

“Don’t listen to your father, si.. Tony..you are brilliant and did nothing wrong, your aunt, uncle and myself can all agree that these drawings are truly amazing and if your father can’t see that then its on him.. not you, I want you to build these, my boy.. don’t let your dreams and inventions die. And one day you will grow into a great man with an amazing future.You will make the world proud, you will make Captain America proud because i’m already proud of you Tony, Always have been and always will.”

Tony heard Bucky hum in agreement and he felt tears in his eyes again, “How can I make Cap proud…at school, Zeke said he wasn’t real..” he heard Bucky growl and Jarvis shook his head before Bucky answered, “Cap is real.. and I know damn well if he was here right now he would be proud of you Tony, never let anyone say he isn’t real, he is real.. he is.” Tony could only nod and asked, “who is Steve? I heard that name before..”

“Steve is a good man, as good as Cap” Bucky simply said as he hugged Tony tighter and Jarvis ran his hand smoothly against his arm, He knew he fell asleep against his Uncle’s chest, he stirred when he heard Aunt Peggy and Bucky talking softly, Tony was too tired to pay attention and he hugged his plush closer and he imagined a voice he always thought Cap would have say softly, ‘I’m proud of you Tony’ oh how Tony wished the Captain was here now.

 

 


	3. A Day in A Life

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony Learns how to fake a smile,   
> Learns to be someone else
> 
> Warning: Bullying through out this chapter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First of all, I'm so sorry for such a late reply my life has ben crazy these past weeks, i've been sick and a death in the family just made everything worse. I'm working on my stories so just hold on tight everyone!

Tony grew to be a very bright boy, he was incredibly smart; so much that he had to skip grades to be with peers with the same mentality which meant a young eight year old Tony starting his Middle school year early. At home he mostly kept his head down and out of his father's way for years since the event when he was younger, he was  careful to never cross paths with him and his Aunt and Uncle were sure to help him with that as Howard continued to succumb to the bottles and his mother was seen less and less, in those years Tony kept Captain America close to him hugging it tightly each night when he could hear Howard's heavy footsteps down the hall there was a moment where he was scared, once Howard was too drunk, too out of it that he stumbled into Tony's room and dragged him out of bed and yelling at the poor boy and not understanding what he was saying, Bucky luckily was walking to go check on the little boy when he heard the screaming and his mind went into solider mode, he managed to grabbed Howard with metal arm, (he had shown it to Tony once when Tony could understand) and threw the man out of the room before turning to face a very shocked Tony. 

Yet the little boy wasn't crying, he stopped crying for a very long time and it pained Bucky to see how quickly he learned to bottle everything up, he picked Tony up in his arms and felt him shake while holding onto his plush like it was the only thing holding him together and he gave Tony a gentle hug before laying in the small bed with his nephew, he was open to close his eyes, planning to deal with Howard in the morning when he heard the smallest whisper against his chest followed by a sad whimper, "I'm not good enough.." Bucky clenched his jaw tight and held the boy close until he knew he was asleep before slowly and carefully prying himself away and making his way towards Howard's study and what a surprise the man was cradling yet another bottle. Now back when Bucky was first taken by Zola and they were brainwashing him, he became The Winter Solider but since the day Peggy and Howard saved him he surpassed that persona until that very night. 

Bucky knew he had scared Howard, he could see the man's eyes widen in panic and his grip on the bottle slipping, Howard saw what he was capable of before he was saved and he heard him stammer until Bucky grabbed him by his shirt with his metal hand, the fabric stretching with the sudden movement and growled, a deep rumble come from his chest as he stares into Howard's panicked yet dazed eyes, and for a long pause he frowns "you are not worth spilling blood on the floor.. " he let go before curling his right hand, "but you do deserve this" as he finished the sentence he connected his fist with Howard's jaw and saw the man crash down to the floor before he turned and left the room to let Peggy and Jarvis know why had happened.

\---

Tony arrived at school by his driver and he sighed as eyes turned towards him, he ducked his head and quickly pushed his way through the crowd of pre-teens and checked in with the office, after a short introduction with the principal he received his class schedule and ignored the murmur of words around him as he made his way to his locker, sighing when he looked up and it was the one on top, Tony was short for his age and seeing as he was younger than normal middle schoolers he had a very hard time reaching up to open the locker door, laughs surrounded him as he stood on his tip toes and barely managed to tug the lock off. briefly hugging his backpack where his plush laid hidden he gather the courage to put his bag into his locker and closing it up again when a hand shoves him into the lockers he held back a whimper as the voices around him quieted down and he looked up to see a boy much larger and older than him smirking down at him, "I think you you got off the wrong school kid, you should go back to kindergarten" 

Tony sighed and frowned as he shoved the bullies hand off him, and walked away ignoring the calls from the bully, he quickly made his way to class his hands curling into fist as he wanted to go back and grab his plush for the sense of security. 

Throughout the day he was harassed by other students for his age and his height, of course he all shut up once they knew how smart he actually was but instead of making everything better it made it worse and he sighed, this was going to be a very long year. 

\---

The day Tony Stark began to fake smiles and put on the signature Stark mask was when his father demanded he attend a public function, usually his Aunt Peg would convince Howard to not let him go, but this year he was practically dragged out to go, as he stood next to his mother he looked up at them and saw the fake smiled Howard gave his mother and the smile on tighten when he directed it towards him, he saw his mothers eyes looking anywhere but at him and thats where it clicked in his mind, he had to put a face in public, he saw how the adults around him were friendly to that fake persona that was Howard Stark and Tony began to think how that would make the bullies back away. 

it had been six months since he started school and he had came home with one too many bruises, he did everything to hide it from those he cared about but he knew he couldn't' hide the whines and flinches from the bruise when he was hugged but he was thankful his Aunt, Uncle and Jarvis didn't say anything about it. as the weeks turned to months he slowly began to perfect his own Stark mask and he smiled the fake smile around his peers, the bullies began to back away but he was still the main target yet he didn't care he began to give them what they deserve soon after, be it by blackmail, fights or even showing prove to the principal of the bullying the student body began to stay far away from him and he was okay with that.

He will be okay with that.

It was only at night, in the safety of his blankets and dark room where the Stark Mask would crumble and he would bury his face in his plush and sob, letting all the stress of the day out and letting all of his worries, anger, sadness out at the plush. Not knowing that his Aunt was listening from behind his door and closed her eyes, wiping her tears away, she saw how Tony began to change and she couldn't do anything to help him.

\---

 

It was the longest two years of his life for Tony, he managed to skip seventh grade and pass eighth grade without breaking a sweat, he began his high school life at age ten and learned to ignore the laughs and mean words that were thrown at him by the older crowd. He stood momentarily at the entrance to his new school and closed his eyes, he could feel Cap resting against his back in his bag and he nodded to himself. When he opened his eyes he had the mask up and smirked as he walked with all the confidence he could fake as he made it to his homeroom. 

Most people would think of Tony as a sad, lonely child even if he would be surrounded by people during lunch, people knew they were just his friends for his money, for his status and Tony was okay with that it was just for four years then he would leave all of those people behind, seeing them suffer with their not smart minds and tony would be successful and one day all those bullies would work for him, he knew they were using him but maybe he could use them as well. He knew Cap would not be happy with him but as Tony grew older he began see how much he had failed his Captain, there were times where he would come home from school and be too ashamed to look at his poster. 

It was getting worse as time pass by until he took the poster down and hid it in his closet, the wall where it once hung proudly was bare and Tony felt a part of him died, of course he still held his plush close, whispering apologizes in the darkness of his room, hoping that Cap would still be proud of him. He even began to distant himself from his Aunt and Uncle, especially after Jarvis's death. No one knew his health was weakening. No one knew he was silently suffering. 

"Jarvis..J.. Don't go.." Tony whispered as he sat the edge of his bed, holding onto Jarvis's hand and feeling the weak squeeze, He held back the tears as he looked at his butler, no his father's face, he was more of a father than Howard and he didn't know what he would do without him, "please.." he whispered in a broken voice until Jarvis spoke softly.

"Tony my boy... don't be sad, you..you are growing into a fine man.. but.. " he coughed before he continued in a wheezing voice, "Don't forget who you are in here.." He pulled his hand away from Tony's to point to his heart, "you will be a good man..you won't be like your father.. and I'm sorry that I can't be with you more.. but I will..always..be with you Tony..I'm proud of you..always.." he whispered his last words as Tony froze, J's hand getting colder with each second, the world around him going into a blur, he didn't remember screaming, he didn't remember Bucky's arms wrapping tight around him and pulling him out of the room, he couldn't remember Peggy's tear stained face look at Tony with sadness, he trashed and tried to go back to Jarvis's side hoping it was all a joke that he would wake up and schooled him for cursing. 

He felt so numb.

He did remember when he was in his room and he broke down and sobbed, he grabbed his plush and hugged it with all the strength he had, only letting go when he fell asleep on the floor. 

That was when he began sneaking bottles of beer into his room, thats when he began disappointing everyone around him. 

\---

It was some weeks later, during lunch hour when Tony made a huge mistake. 

Opening his backpack in the lunchroom. 

He forgot something and when he opened his bag and saw the familiar red, white and blue he regretted it. 

A hand reached over him and pulled him out, Tony didn't react fast enough when he turned and saw the kid, he forgot his name, laughing at him, "Stark? I thought you were cool but you're just a baby with a doll! loser! he's carrying a stupid Captain America doll, such a little girl!" 

Tony froze as the rest of the classroom erupted in laughter minus some few people who looked at him in pity and others that were getting help, but he knew no one would help him, no one was going to help him, he had to help himself. 

"Give it back!" he yelled as the kid threw it to a friend across the table who failed to catch it and it fell into his tray with ketchup. 

All Tony saw was red, he ran ran to the kid and shoved him down, he turned to reach for his plush when the student body began to laugh at him as his hero was being thrown around until Tony was able to snatch it back and running out of the lunch room, the laughter following him out to the courtyard, he ran to an empty bathroom and broke down in one of the stalls, he held the toy against his chest and sobbed quietly the laughter and the insults repeating over and over in his mind. He didn't leave the stall until the last bell rang and he was sure no one was around as he fetched his backpack that was thrown into the trash and went home. 

He didn't leave his own little workshop for days, he ignored the pleads from his Aunt and Uncle to talk to them, he ignored going up to eat, he avoided sleeping as mochas he could and he avoided looking at his plush that was thrown across the workshop in anger. 

It wasn't until a week later where he picked up the plush and held it close again, its side stained in red wherein landed on the tray. 

"I'm sorry.." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The cafeteria bully scene is something that I witnessed in my school years,it didn't go exactly as it was written but still I didn't do anything to stop it I wanted to but I couldn't and I just watched and that moment is stuck in my mind since then, I wish I could have done something back then.


	4. Time Heals all Wounds

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony's life spirals out of control.
> 
> in a good and bad way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooooo... as I was writing my other stories I had the motivation to write another chapter! yay! 
> 
> At first I was planning to only have 5 chapters to this story but seeing as how angsty this became (Sorry!) I'm going to be adding one more chapter, we'll see how it goes :3 
> 
> WARNING: Strong abusive language in the beginning.   
> Howard is dick I swear

Once graduation rolled around and he got accepted into MIT (a fourteen year old no less) He returned home after the ceremony  smelling of alcohol and other questionable scents. the last few months of summer he been leaving behind his plush, returning home late and avoiding his Aunt and Uncle. He didn't want to face them , he didn't want to see the disappointment on their faces at all the shit he was doing most nights he avoided going home until one night he ran into a very angry Howard. 

_"What do you think you're doing?"_

_Hit_

_"A disgrace, A failure! we're a Weapons company not whatever bullshit you're thinking?!"_

_Hit_

_"Sometimes I wish you were never born! You never do anything right!"_

_Hit_

_"You're tarnishing the Stark name!"_

It wasn't until close to midnight that Tony limped back to his room, an icepack pressed against his cheek and his father's words repeating over and over in his mind, he sat at the foot of his bed staring at the floor. He felt alone and there was no one he could turn to, no one to help him, no one to save him. His eyes landed on the packet to MIT and he stood and limped over to his desk, his arm wrapped around his torso as he set the ice packet down and picked the packet up with his free hand, he flipped through the acceptance letter and other useless information when his eyes landed on the housing and he turned to look at his room. 

After Jarvis died he began to hate walking through the hall, he began to turn the music up louder in his workshop just so he can drown out his memories. Tony wanted to leave and seeing the packet gave him the reason to finally do it, he quickly moved over to his closet and pulled out a suitcase and a pained whined escape his lips as he tried to pull it down from the top shelf, Howard really did a number on him but no more. Tony won't let it ever happen again, he would leave, he would leave everything behind, go to school, away from everyone. 

away from...

His eyes landed on the plush that was thrown against a chair and forgotten there for a very long time, he shakily reached out and picked it up shame and guilt washed over him as he held the precious toy close, "I can't take you..I won't.." 

"You should Tony, you won't be alone"

Tony spun around quickly despite the nasty bruise on his side and saw his Aunt and Uncle standing by the door, he looked away and back at the plush, "I can't.." his voice sounded smaller almost as if he was that little boy that died years ago and he felt warm arms embrace him, he leaned into his Aunt's hug, Peggy started to look much older now, she still had that strong determination in her eyes but he saw how the years were not kind to her and he wrapped his arms around her as Bucky placed his hand on his shoulder and thats when let the tears he bottled up out. It wasn't for a while until his sobs quietened down and his tight hold on his Aunt and his Cap loosen a bit. Bucky moved to help him pack and Tony was grateful they didn't oppose him leaving. 

"Tony..take Cap with you, take him where we can't be.. you'll be okay Tony.. Cap won't ever leave you. my sweet little boy i'm so sorry" she whispered as Bucky pulled him into a tight hug, minding his injuries and whispered, "Cap will be with you soon" 

Tony frowned and looked at him for more answer but knew he wouldn't get any as he placed Cap in his bag and with the help of his small family he was on his way to MIT. 

\---

He was thankful college students weren't dumbasses like everyone he meet previously, of course there were still some but other than that he was safe especially since no one knew him, only knew his name and he was going to use that to his advantage then again he did perfect the Stark mask. Tony walked with confidence until he reached his dorm, there wasn't many people there, seeing as they wouldn't move in until later that month he opened his dorm room and walked in to some ACDC and he felt that his roommate was going to be cool. 

As he walked into the decent sized living room he saw a young man sitting on the couch reading, Tony felt awkward and cleared his throat as he dropped his bags on the ground by his feet and whistled, "Nice place you got man" the young man jumped slightly and scrambled to lower the volume on the music and looked at Tony with a confused look, "I'm guessing you're my new roommate?" 

Tony reached out to shake hands with his fake smile, "Hope I didn't disappoint, I'm Tony Sta--" 

"I know who you are, and honestly I don't care if you're a Stark, I'm just glad you're not some dumb Jock. I'm James Rhodes nice to meet you" he grasped Tony's hand and shook it once and Tony blinked in confusion, he did not expect that and he awkwardly lowered his hand to his side and placed his grin back on his face, "Rhodes? Can I call you Rhodey? Rhodes just sounds too formal seeing as we're going to be roommates and all" 

Rhodes laughed and shook his head, "Whatever man, my grandmother calls me Rhodey whats one more person.. go on kid, your room is down the hall to the left" Tony felt that this would be an interesting year as he nodded, his mask slipping for a moment and he grabbed his stuff before going to his room, he slowly unpacked and let out a breath as he pulled his Cap plush out from his bag and hugged him, "It'll be okay..he seems nice" 

\---

Tony hid his Cap well enough when Rhodey was around, even if he was nice and he put up with his bullshit he knew the other thought Tony to be arrogant and obnoxious, that was until a very bad day that Tony was too stressed from his classes and keeping up with his reputation that he pulled his Cap out from its hiding spot and curled up in his bed with it and let a single tear out. 

He forgot to lock his door and Rhodey walked in, "Hey Tony did..Tony?" Tony sat up and scrambled to hid his plush, his eyes wide in panic and he wiped his face he opened his mouth to say a stupid excuse but nothing came out and he looked down, ready to be laughed at but it never came, he felt a warm hand on his shoulder and looked up in fear as Rhodey smiled softly, "So this is the real Tony..I knew you were just bullshitting everything, come here man" he pulled the younger boy into a tight one arm hug and Tony sat there shocked, his shaking hands gripping onto his plush. 

"So thats Captain America right? he's cool, after I graduate I'm going into the army..that man was an inspiration" Tony stilled looked at him with wide eyes and swallowed to find his voice, "Y..You're okay..with this? y..You're not going to laugh?" he bit his lip and Rhodey shook his head. 

"Nah Man, seeing how much wear the plush is looking i'm think its very important to you.. and thats okay, but don't handle this on your own okay? I'm your friend and i'm here for you.. so stop wearing the stupid mask around me got it?" 

Tony could only nod slowly as he genuinely smiled, "okay..yea..thats great.. man I knew you were awesome Rhodey!" the teen grinned and threw himself onto his new friend, Rhodey laughed and hugged Tony until the boy fell asleep, yea this was going to be a very good year.

\---

Of course nothing good ever stays that long, especially when Tony throws a party in there dorm and after one too many drink were passed around, a dumb jock as Rhodey calls them managed to somehow make it to Tony's room where his plush was sitting and dread washed over him as he saw him stumble back out and laughed, "Stark what the shit is this? you have a toy? hahaha" of course the rest of the room erupted in laughter he paled, there were a few that didn't laugh and rolled their eyes and some that were angry at the Jock, especially the lovely Virgina Potts of course he dubbed her Pepper for the lovely freckles on her face. 

He became friends with her when he tried to invite her to bed ( everyone believed he was eighteen okay) and she called him out, since then it was the start of a very beautiful friendship if you don't count how she and Rhodey would team up to nag at Tony when he went on a inventor binge, like Hello he was a genius he had to make the numbers in his head come to life, his current project? a helper robot it was so far working out great. 

She too was the only other person to see past his bullshit and she may have admitted the Tony rubbed off on her, (in a totally good way, you perverts) and was also there when he needed someone during those bad days, He had showed her Cap and she smiled warmly saying that she too had a plush that she always carried around with her and that he shouldn't be ashamed of having him. 

But at that moment he did feel ashamed and the jock shoved him against the wall and laughed as Tony tried t grab for his plush, the jock threw it over to his group of friends and why are most jocks idiots? they began to tug it between them until a loud tear silenced the room and Tony felt the blood rush out of him as the jocks blinked then laugh tossing the two halves around and one stumbled and of course the world hated Tony, why would it help him, the window was open in their third floor dorm and it fell out into the darkness below and Tony curled his fist and threw a punch to the jock that started it all.

"The party is over..now fuck off, all of you!" he nearly screamed as he snatched the other half of his plush and stood in the middle of the room as everyone began to file out, leaving Rhodey and Pepper behind, "Tony..." she whispered, he could hear RHodey curse at how stupid the jocks were and claimed he was going to go out and look for the other half when Tony stopped him, "Pep..you said not to be ashamed.. but I am! all my life i've been bullied because of his piece of shit..all my life I've been alone because of him!" he squeezed the plush tightly and anger radiated out of him as he walked to the trash, "All I ever get is problems with this.. it never helped me.. and if Cap was real he would be disappointed in me as my father was..I hate him..I hate him and i'm glad the jocks did this" his voice broke towards the end as he threw the other half in the trash and walked away, back to his room and slammed the door, he let himself fall onto his bed with empty hands and he sobbed. 

the next morning he woke up to see his plush laying in his arms, a faint stitch marks were seen around the torso and head where it ripped and he saw how it was cleaner than it was, he looked at it for a moment when he noticed a piece of paper stuck to it, 

"Cap won't ever be disappointed..

He'll be proud of you like how we're proud of you Tony

don't be ashamed" 

Pepper and Rhodey

He sobbed again and held the note and plush close to him, he was going to be okay. 

\---

He was okay until his senior year were he received a call from his Uncle saying that Howard and Maria were in an accident and Tony didn't hear the rest, yes he resented his parents, and yes he hated Howard but they were still his parents and everything was in a blur as he managed to go back home and embraced his Aunt and Uncle who were waiting for him, Rhodey and Pepper went with him and Bucky approved of their friendship seeing how close the trio were and told them what had happened or at least what he heard. 

Howard was driving under the influence. of course Stark industries paid a lot of money to not have that published in the news and it was written off as Howard swerving off the road to avoid hitting another car, and that caused the accident. Tony rolled his eyes and scoffed, "of course, the public still glorified him tis the end" he muttered when a voice called out to him and he looked up to see a taller man walking to him, Obidaiah Stane, thats right his father's business partner, he had met him a couple times when he was forced to attend parties. The man was okay but there was something that always seemed off but he was always there so he pushed that aside. "Tony my boy, I'm deeply sorry for your loss, your father was a good man, great inventor.. its said to see them gone so soon" Tony stared at him and ignored all he said something about running the occupant until Tony was twenty one and something else and when he left Bucky frowned. 

"Tony.. there's something that went on.. the story that they told me of your parents death.. it didn't add up. I know Howard had issues but he would never drive under the influence, theres something going on.." he was waved off by Tony and sighed, "Uncle Buck..its whatever.. it doesn't matter anymore" 

Tony didn't cry at the funeral.

Tony stopped crying since then. 

\---

Tony graduated with top marks, he managed to finish his robot he was proud of the little guy even if he screwed up in many things he does, but the bot was determined to help Tony and he fondly named him DUM-E. his latest project was an artificial intelligence and he was close to making it work. of course once they graduated, Rhodey went off to the Air Force and Pepper went back to D.C to start an intern work but they both promised that they were a call away if he ever needed them, those two became important parts of Tony's life and he would protect and cherish them with what little good he had in him. 

he started working for S.I and giving them weapons designs even if he hated it, he didn't want to make weapons but as the years passed the plans for the cellphone and greener energy dropped to the bottom of the pile he wanted to make Obi proud seeing as he couldn't do it with Howard so he promised he was going to make more weapons. 

And he finished J.A.R.V.I.S. if anyone would ask it stood for Just Another Really Very Intelligent System but his Aunt and Uncle knew the real meaning and they hugged Tony when it woke up to that same British accent as their dear old friend, it was shortly after when his Aunt had a stroke and her health began to fail, she did everything she could to hide it from Tony but there were times when she began to forget who he was, it hurt Tony..truly it did but Peggy told him that she was proud of him and that he should do good with the talent he had. 

Tony promised but everyone knew he never kept promises. 

Two years later, Peggy Carter passed away peacefully in her sleep. 

\---

Bucky then went on a mission and there were times when he spent time aboard, he would call Tony and check in on him, but Tony waved him off saying he was okay and whatnot. he turned twenty one just a month before and he was busy with S.I work and other inventions, he recruited Pepper as his personal assistant and she ran the company for him when he was too busy, he as thankful she was a part of his life and he didn't stop telling her that every day. Of course there was a moment where they tried to be a couple but they both knew it it wasn't meant to be and they returned to being best friends, something that didn't happen often. 

Tony continued to be a playboy, he had to keep up his old ways. 

Tony continued to fake it in front of the cameras. 

Bit his life was pretty much where he wanted it to be and he was fine with it, with all the lies, both Pepper and Rhodey called him out on it but what could he do? he was Tony Stark.

\---

Then Afghanistan happened. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry if it was a little rushed in the end and not to many info, i may go back and fix it OTL but here you go!


	5. Intermission

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the super late replies, I just want to make sure I didn't have any grammar and spelling issues with my chapters on all my stories. Thank you for being Patient!

In the months following Tony's self escaped mission from Afghanistan and the birth of Iron Man, Tony Stark took it upon himself to hunt every single one of his weapons down until they were all destroyed. To Tony he didn't know if his life turned for the better or worse, perhaps a little of both for one part he now has a miniaturized Arc Reactor embedded in his chest, keeping shrapnels from crawling its way into his heart and his simple, carefree lifestyle was long gone well that could be a good thing, in those three months he was captured he grew and matured, saw Death dancing around him with each second that passed by and saw an innocent man die due to his ignorance on the whereabouts of his own weapons. If anyone asks, Tony Starks life had changed for the better, everything else was minor details. 

On nights that he felt alone and on the edge of despair that not even a bottle of whiskey would soothe it, he turned and held onto his plush. On nights like these where the nightmares of caves and water overwhelmed him and the sharp pain in his chest did not let him sleep he laid in his bed hiding onto the only thing that kept him sane, The tattered and worn plush kept reminding him to keep going, to keep fighting. 

When he returned from Afghanistan, Rhodey and Bucky helping him from the plane he waved off any medical assistance, (please he may be broken but he still had pride) he thanked his best friend and Uncle and followed Pepper who gently handed him the plush within the safety of the limo and Tony stared at the toy in his hand before gently holding it close to his face, thankful for his sunglasses for it hid his tear filled eyes,  Pepper never spoke a word of that moment, and neither did he. 

He sighed and rolled onto his side as he tried to get some sleep but it was a lost cause and he forced himself to get up and wonder down to his workshop with the plush still held against his chest, He figured would be a waste of time trying to sleep when he could work on his suit. 

Pulling up blueprints his eyes laid on the Jericho missile and his fingers went up to the Arc reactor and tapped a familiar rhythm, When he was in that cave and the terrorist demand he built a Jericho he was shocked, he just did a weapons demonstration the day prior, the public had no knowledge, a upsetting feeling was felt in the pit of his stomach on how the Ten Rings got word of the missile. Tony ran a tired hand over his face and looked down at the plush, “I don’t know what to do..” 

Each time he went out on a hunt he would come back with a new bullet hole in his armor and each time he went out he began to enjoy the fear the terrorist had whenever they see him, “I’m just a disappointment Cap, no matter what I do, but I got to keep going.. I can’t stop..” he whispered before setting Cap down on the table and turning back to the holograms, waving his hand and a blueprint of his newest suit appeared in its place.

 

 - - -

 

Dying of Palladium poisoning wasn’t that bad, Tony laughed when all of the elements he tested were a bust, it didn’t hurt not like Stane’s betrayal and he was okay, after the last element was a bust, he gave up. Why would he waste his time trying to find a nonexistent cure where he could be out there, partying or spending time with his friends but here he was, Neither Pepper nor Rhodey knew of his impending end and he liked it that way, he already gave Pepper CEO rights to his company and that was a weight of his shoulders, he knew Pepper would be a better CEO and keep the company running with ease. Rhodes got a suit that he wanted, well okay so he took it but Tony didn’t blame him, that party was potentially his last and he went a little overboard, then again Natalie advised him to go that, well perhaps not in that way but he still blamed her. before he even began to prepare for the party he set Cap in his closet, not wanting him to see him in that state, Tony laughed at how crazy he was being and shook his head as he left his room, once again Bucky was away on a mission and Tony was okay that, he didn’t want his uncle to be disappointed in him, then again every time he saw him, he gave Tony that look and Tony began to disappear into his workshop, especially after Monaco Tony didn’t blame his Uncle.

The hangover after the party was the worst he ever had in ages, pretty much out scored that one time in college where ..yea no he was in too much pain to even remember anything as he sat in Randy’s donut, he was enjoying his morning, not a care in the world until he heard Fury, he looked down at him and narrowed his eyes, he remembered that son of a bitch from when he was younger, huh what did he want now, he thought as he did as told and stumbled, gracefully if anyone wondered, down the donut and into the shop, well that was odd there was no one around, of course Fury would close off the area. 

What he didn’t expect was Natalie coming up to him with a tight outfit sticking a needle in his neck, he also didn’t expect to feel a hell lot better, there wasn’t that pull in his chest or the constant exhaustion, “What did you do to me? and you” he said through narrowed eyes at Natalie, “you’re fired”  he looked between Fury and Natalie, “All I did was give you something that would scratch the itch, its not a cure..thats up to you”  Fury said with a pointed look. 

“I tried, I tried everything and nothing worked Fury.. I don’t know what to do” 

“Try harder, you didn’t try everything” 

Tony was confused, what had he not tried? he spent countless hours but was it possible he missed something? overlooked a crucial piece of information? he lost himself in his train of thought and when he looked up neither Fury nor the double agent were there and he sighed, he picked himself up from the booth and made his way back to his mansion, equations running through his head now that he could think clearer. 

Once he got back he found several boxes labeled _‘Property of Howard Stark’_ in his living room floor and he went to work, he pulled Cap from his closet and set him down next to him as he looked through countless notes from his father and sighed, “come on Dad.. give me something.. what haven’t I tried?” he ran his hands over his face and turned his head to look at his plush and thats when it hit him, especially glaring down at its small shield, His father not only was part of Project: Rebirth but he also created the Shield which was made of Vibrinium, he had a Eureka moment as he grinned and hugged his plush, “Thank you Cap, Thank you dad lets go” he shouted as he got to work, not knowing Bucky was watching from the shadows and smiled softly at Tony, he hadn’t seen a genuine smile from him in a long time and he was happy things will start to look up. 

 

\- - - 

 

“Why didn’t you tell me you found him?! you know how much he means to me!” Tony shouted at Bucky who sighed and held his hands up, “Tony, I know and I’m sorry I didn’t tell you but orders..”

“Orders?! from who? Fury? didn’t know you worked for him _Uncle_ ,  but didn’t you say that family comes first?! how could you not tell me!” Tony shouted as he threw a screwdriver across the room, they were in the workshop when Bucky came in with the news that they found Captain America and de iced him a few weeks ago, he was hurt on not only his Uncle keeping the info that Cap was found from him, but what he kept it a secret for three weeks. 

“Tony..” 

“Get out..just go”  Tony sighed tiredly and turned his back to Bucky who reluctantly left without a word and Tony looked at the hologram screen in front of him, it was bad enough Fury rejected his acceptance into the Avengers Initiative and Natasha’s..Natalie whatever her name reported on him, her report was biased and neither her nor Fury cared to remember that he was dying, anyone in his shoes would have done the same thing, he played it off cool, like he always does but deep inside it still hurts. 

“Guess I won’t ever be a hero or meet my hero..” Tony whispered dejectedly and went back to work on his latest suit, the Mark VII

\- - -

Tony was nervous, he was nervous as hell as he made his way to Germany, he wasn’t nervous about a rogue God causing trouble he was nervous about meeting Captain America, When Agent Coulson, his first name is Agent he refused to call him Phil, handed him the Avengers Initiative case and basically was told he was in he almost, a slight almost jumped for joy. Tony read up on every he needed to know before taking off and he whispered to himself.

“please like me..please like me” 

“I’m sure he will Sir” 

“Shut up Jarvis” Tony hushed him in amusement as he saw the Quinjet 

he smirked as he ordered Jarvis to hack the PA system and blast ‘Shoot to thrill” throughout the speakers, 

“Romonav you missed me?” he smirked as he flew around the jet and landed next to his childhood hero, “Captain” he smiled to him when he heard, “Mr.Stark” from the man, good he knew him, hopefully Fury gave him the report on all the things he's done right, small list but still. 


	6. You're a good man Tony

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aline invasion and near death experience oh my

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh my gosh i'm so sorry for such a long delay, I got sick and with work and school and a massive writers block i just couldn't update any of my stories :( please forgive me and I hope you like this chapter :) 
> 
> So I was thinking of ending my story here, after a very long chapter but then i realized that thats not where i want my story to go, i want more feels more angst before it gets fluffy. 
> 
> I know theres a ton of other stories following the timelines of the movie and talking about Tony's nightmares and whatnot it'll be worth it for the ending!! 
> 
> I know there's a lot of dialogue and I'm sorry :/

“Big man in a suit of armor. Take that off, what are you?” 

“Genius, Billionaire, playboy, philanthropist” 

Tony knew this was getting way out of hand the moment they all stepped foot into the lab, he felt all his pent up anger just gushing out; like a dam and he couldn’t stop it, glancing around he saw it was effecting the others as well, he wanted to shout, to just tell everyone to shut up but he couldn't and when he looked back at the Captain  and all the buried resent and bitterness resurfaced towards the man in front of him and towards his Uncle for keeping it a secret that he was with him, that is until the Captain spoke. 

“I know guys with none of that worth ten of you. I’ve seen the footage. The only thing you really fight for is yourself. You’re not the guy to make the sacrifice play, to lay down on a wire and let the other guy crawl over you” 

_ I know guys with none of that worth ten of you..  _ that single sentence hit him hard, he kept repeating the words over again, not worth _ it.. i’m not worth..  _

_ “ _ I..I think I would just cut the wire” 

“Always the way out… You know, you may not be a threat, but you better stop pretending to be a hero” 

That was it, those words hit Tony Stark harder than Stane’s betraying, harder than Howard’s A+ parenting, The one person he held onto during his lonely childhood, the motivation to keep going through his early life and during his time in the cave. Even after everything he has done to right his wrongs, after becoming Iron Man he wasn’t a hero, he knew that… everyone knew that and yet he still held onto that hope. 

When he found out the Captain.. no Steve was alive he was happy, his childhood hero was alive and he would see Tony for who he was and he would be proud of him, but of course the saying ‘Don’t meet your heroes, they turn out to be human’ was right. Why in the world did Tony believe Steve was going to be proud, what wishful thinking. No matter how much good he did, it’ll never out weigh the bad, that is what people would see Tony for, not his brilliant inventions or his achievements but his lows, his parties, his drunkness. 

Tony did look up and saw Steve blink and his eyes widen slightly, perhaps he figured it out that something wasn’t right, maybe he realized what he said but it was too late Tony was hurt and he wanted to bite back his tongue, to stop the next words from coming out but the magic was too strong on his anger and he bitterly snapped, 

“A hero? like you? you’re a lab rat Rogers. Everything special about you came out of a bottle” 

He wanted to take it back. yet in a way it was true. Thanks to his father’s serum Steve is who he was now but no, the man underneath all that was a true hero, Peggy had told him about the time he went into a Hydra base alone to rescue fellow soldiers and his best friend who Tony figured out was Bucky, huh what else was he hiding he wondered and Tony felt he could do anything after he heard that story. He remembered Peggy telling him how much he hated the USO trips but was determine to perform to give the soldiers the motivation to keep fighting. 

To that little boy, Steve Rogers was the hero not Captain America, he saw the pain that flickered through Steve’s eyes. He had to tear his own eyes away and realizing that they stepped closer to each other, he was about to step back when he saw the helicopter and the next thing he knew was he was on the ground being covered by Steve in a protective t later but the look in Steve’s eyes; worrying, concern, alertness, apologetic he bit back his words, he felt Steve’s hand carefully sweeping over his body to make sure he had no external injuries and Tony placed his hand on Steve’s chest,  _ wow… they’re surprisingly soft..  _ he thought as he pushed Steve back slowly and Steve cleared his throat, “Put on the suit” 

“yea”  

 

***

 

“Steve” Bucky called out, it was hours after the attack on the helicarrier and the death of Agent Coulson, it was such a heavy hit for everyone that they had to settle down to take a break before figuring out how to find Thor, Bruce and make their way back to New York. Steve was cleaning off his Shield as his mind wondered back to the argument in the lab, it all happened too fast he had lost control and the look on Starks… no, Tony’s face made him regret everything he had said, that moment he saw the wall, the mask Tony create break and he saw hurt, self disgust and pain in those clear brown eyes he wanted to say he was sorry, that he didn’t mean it that he was happy to work alongside him but it was too late and those words where pushed back for later each time he saw the Billionare. 

Before he flew out to Germany to stop Loki, he was filled in by Bucky on who their teammates were. 

_ “Stevie.. Howard’s son will be part of the team, Tony. but I have to tell you to please don’t judge him on the way he makes himself be seen” Steve was confused, he saw the file that SHIELD provided him of for Stark and he saw who that man was, a little spontaneous and out there, just like Howard was but he didn’t understand what Bucky was implying, “I know who he is, I read his file”  _

_ “Those files are bullshit, SHIELD just said everything Tony was in the past, which I tell you now he isn’t... He is so much more as a person Steve, SHIELD probably told you to look him up on the internet right?” after a brief nod Bucky sighed, “the internet is good but also the worst.. Tony had gone through so much shit Steve, I don’t know where to begin and it isn’t my place to tell but I will say to give him a chance and don’t let that masked persona he wears on the outside lead you to think of him differently. He looked up to you, you were…are his hero”  _

_ Steve frowned, Bucky seems close to Stark and he knew the other continued to give assistance to Howard until the man passed away, and he felt himself ask, “Why do you care so much for him Buck?”  _

_ “I saw the way the kid grew up, Howard was bad, real bad towards him. He yelled at him, hit him and disregarded him as a son.. I, as well as Peggy became family to him. we were his Aunt and Uncle along with J, his butler, we were all he had as a family”  _

_ Steve was silent, he knew Howard was an odd man. too focused on his work that he was surprised when he found out Tony was his son, he thought the man he knew changed but he guessed not and he nodded, he could only imagine what Tony had been through and he saw it in the way Bucky talked, how concerned he was for him.  _

_ “I get it Bucky..besides, I want to meet him, I saw some of the things he built and its all too surreal.. did he really build a robot helper? a robot?”  _

_ Bucky chuckled and nodded, “thats not the only thing he built, that kid is a genius much like Howard but the things he makes actually work unlike that flying care Howard built” Steve sorted a chuckled and nodded, “promise me, you’ll look out for him as well.. he needs someone Steve, he needs his hero”  _

_ “I’m not a hero Buck..not in that way.. but I will try”  _

_ “Don’t hurt him Steve, Please”  _

Thinking back, Steve broke that promise with everything he said to the man, he felt a pang in his chest as he recalled the look in his eyes, before he settled down to clean his shield he quickly sketched on a random piece of paper the way Tony’s eyes looked before he slipped the mask back on. Even though Tony also said some mean things he was right, he was just a lab experiment he wasn’t special. 

he closed his eyes and sighed before the voiced called out to him again, “Steve!” snapping out of his thought he looked up at Bucky who stood there with is brow raised, “been calling you for a while now, you were deep in thought kid wanna share with the rest of us?” 

Steve shook his head and set his shield aside, “what is it Bucky..did you find Thor and Dr.Banner?” Bucky shook his head and he opened his mouth to ask for Tony but he kept it shut instead, “No, but we’re landing in New York soon, Tony will be flying ahead to check on his tower” 

“He said Loki would be using it as a power station” 

Bucky nodded and sighed, “this is going to a battle of the century.. well for you at least” he chuckled and clapped Steve on his shoulder, “We have to win this..for Coulson” 

“For the world” 

***

They worked so well as a team, it was surprising on how fluid they moved around each other, even when Clint joined up with them he filled in the missing pieces together and soon enough they quickly stopped the first wave of Chitauri from harming any civilians. and Tony was mildly shocked on how well he worked with Steve, they danced around each other, fending off aliens from each others back and that awesome beam to shield move was killer and he forgot temporally the argument they had on the helicarrier. 

Soon after the 3rd wave of alien creeps, JARVIS alerted him of an incoming nuke, he cursed under his breath and turned to look Steve who was fighting a small group of Chitauri, Tony looked at him sadly before taking off into the air and turning to catch up to the nuke before it got too close to the city when Natasha and Steve’s voice’s filled through his intercom,

“I can close it!” 

“Do it!”

“No wait!” Tony grunted as he gently placed his hands on the belly of the nuke and rerouted all his power to his thrusters as he guided the nuke up towards the sky, “I have a nuke..and I..I know where to put it” he stalled as he felt his heart beat against his chest as he flew closer and closer the wormhole in the sky, 

“Tony…you know thats a one way stop..” 

Tony felt and heard the worry and concern laced in the Captain’s voice that he struggled not to let his emotions free. 

“I know.. but someone once told me that I couldn’t make the sacrifice play.. to lay on the wire. well i’m here to show the person that I can..and I will” 

“ Tony.. that..” 

He heard the regret, it was too late, Tony had to do this. To save the millions of people currently in Manhattan he would sacrifice himself, no one will miss him not truly anyway. 

“I’m sorry Cap but this is my stop..” Tony closed his eyes as he flew through the wormhole and let the nuke go, he let out a quiet sob as he opened his eyes and saw the nuke fly towards the Chitauri’s mothership. He mumbled softly to himself, “You finally did something worth it Tony” he smiled and let his eyes drift close as the world around him faded into blackness. 

Steve wanted to yell, what Tony was doing was heroic and selfless. The man that he argued with was no more, or was it the files that Bucky warned him against that made him judge him before he actually got to know him, yet during the fight they worked so well together almost as if they were meant to be a team, he thought back to the Howling Commandos and he almost sobbed, even though Bucky was there, the only thing he had left fro the past, it still hurt that he lost so much time with his makeshift family that as he watched Tony guide the missile upwards and recalled the argument that seemed so long ago he heard his voice fill with regret and worry. 

He watched as Tony disappeared and with a heavy heart he ordered out to Natasha, “Close it..” not wanting to see the wormhole close he turned his head away and slowly willed his body to turned as well, he gripped onto the nearest wrecked car and took a deep breath, he didn’t even notice the remaining Chitauri drop dead around them but  he did hear a bristling of a cape and a heavy hand on his shoulder, “Man of Iron will not be forgotten for his acts today will be heard throughout the nine realms!” Thor reassured which did not settle well for Steve and he felt Bucky’s familiar footsteps quickly reaching him before he gasped. 

“well that lucky, crazy son of bitch..” He heard Bucky mumbled and before he could correct his best friend on the cussing, mostly out of habit than anything he felt his metal hand forcing Steve to turn, he saw that Bucky was looking up and so he did as well and he nearly gasped at the sight, the familiar red and gold striking against the blue of the clear sky. he felt his lips twitched up into a small smile until he noticed something was wrong, Thor beating him to it, “He’s not slowing down” Steve was about to tell Thor to go up there until the Hulk’s roar silenced him. 

He looked up and saw that he jumped from building to building in attempt to catch up to Tony, Steve was worried for his friend, were they friends? since the helicarrier incident they rarely had the chance to talk and Steve was determine to change that once Tony was safe. He let a breath of relief out once the Hulk caught him and brought him down to the ground, everything moved slowly as he kneeled next to Tony and Thor ripped the faceplate off. Tony’s face looked peaceful almost if he was sleeping, Steve took the moment to just memorize his features before his hand rested over the dark Arc reactor, he knew it was an important piece in keeping Tony alive and seeing it so dark made Steve even more worried, he felt Bucky kneel down next to him and he cursed, “Damn it Tony! come on don’t do this.. come on kid.. wake up” 

Steve moved his gloved hand as Bucky manually override the suit’s manual release and slowly the suit began to fall apart seeing as there was no power to let it smoothly pull apart. Tony continued to lay still as Steve unconsciously moved his hand to cup the side of Tony’s face, no one said anything. Even though the man was infuriating he was brilliant and there was a certain air around him that just drew anyone close. He was about to call for SHIELD when the Hulk roared loudly next to Tony’s head, causing the man to jolt awake, the Arc Reactor once again shining brightly, Steve pulled his hand back and touched the light before completely pulling his hand back. 

Tony looked around franticly and once he saw he was back on Earth and safe, he let his hand fall back and he looked at Steve, “please tell me nobody kissed me.. unless it was Captain Spangles then i’ll let it slide” Steve ducked his head and a light blush spread over his cheeks as he  genuinely smiled, Tony was back and he looked at the man and saw him smiled ever so slightly before he closed his eyes, “guys lets just take a day off tomorrow and  have Shawarma..I never had it but I want to eat it..who's with me?” Steve chuckled as he shook his head as Bucky helped him sit up and pull him into a tight hug, “Damn it kid..don’t do that again!” 

“I’m hardly a kid anymore Uncle but promise, scouts honor and all that” Tony grinned and hugged his uncle back as he Steve smiled once again as the rest of the team made their way back to them.


	7. Nightmares are a regular thing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony is cooping after the attack of New York   
> He's learning to bond with others   
> Heart to heart talk with Captain America?   
> Oh my

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys! sorry for the late update...again! ugh I take forever to update and I apologize. this chapter came out weird so its almost like a filler chapter. it still has plot and it sets the stage for the next chapter but its so random that it can be dubbed as a filler chapter. but I do hope you enjoy! Sorry for all the dialogue and messy paragraph structure. 
> 
> please leave comments I love reading them and it motivates me to keep writing.   
> positive ones maybe? :(   
> thank you!!

It had been a month since the attack on New York and Tony yet again woke up in cold sweat, he sat up and rubbed his hands over his face as he tried to even out his breathing, he turned his head slightly and in the darkness he could make out the outline to his dear plush he kept on his bedside table, reaching out to grab it he immediately stilled his hand in hesitation as he kept reminding himself that hugging the plush is pretty awkward now, seeing as the old Captain is alive and well.. two floors down. 

After the attack he spent three weeks in the tower alone while he remodeled and suffering from sleepless nights he couldn’t take it and he called out to the rest of The Avengers.

_ “Bruce?.. “  _

_ “Tony? whats wrong?”  _

_ Tony cleared his throat as he sat down, he bit his thumb softly before he found the right words to say to the scientist without actually saying what he wanted to.  _

_ “Tony?” Bruce called out again, much softer this time and Tony found the resolve to just get it over with, “Brucie bear how are you? good I hope anyways.. you know my Tower that Loki graciously destroyed? well I realized it’s too big for just little old me.. and I have a large space for you and the big guy but..you know.. Science! and well..”  _

_ he continued to ramble on until the good Doctor cut him off with a soft chuckle, “Tony you know you could just ask me.. you don’t need to come up with an elaborate story in why you need me there. Besides I’m tired of running away but are you sure your Tower can hold.. the other guy?”  _

_ Tony perked up and a grinned over his face and he nodded even though no one could see him, “Of course you’re talking to me! you’ll have you’re own Hulk proof lab and everything”  _

_ “Okay Tony, I’ll be there soon”  _

_ Tony cheered once the line went dead, he felt good about his plan on not being lonely anymore and he eagerly got in touch with Natasha, once she picked up he felt nervous and downright scared. _

_ “Romanoff”  _

_ “Natalie.. Natasha.. whatever your name is.. H..Hi so to make this short and sweet, you should come and stay here in my Tower.. you know Avengers Tower and all.. you can bring your Wonder Twin as well..  there's room for everyone.. and I’m sure you want to get out from under Fury’s nose, maybe keep an eye on me wouldn’t he like that..”  _

_ He got cut off again and he could practically hear her raise eyebrow he swallowed and sat up straighter, it took only a few seconds for her to reply but those few seconds felt like he was waiting on his execution.  _

_ “Alright, count Clint and I in”  _

_ Tony let out a breath of relief and fist pumped the air before he hurriedly said his goodbyes and moved down the list, which was Thor but he had no idea exactly how to get in contact with the Asgardian God and he let JARVIS send out a word in case Thor came accross the call. Which left his uncle and Cap, he sighed and bit his lip as he dialed Bucky’s number and waited. _

_ “Tony? Kid it's been a while..”  _

_ Tony instally grew guilty of casting his only family away but after everything he was still wary, Tony felt more alone than ever and he let a shaky breath out. _

_ “Hey Uncle Buck.. Yea it has.. Well it's been twenty one days, twelve hours thirty minutes and forty two seconds but who’s keeping count right?” He closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose as he try to keep his anxiety down by slowly counting in his head, he leaned forward and rested his elbow on his knee and continued, “Since you're at SHIELD  with Captain spandex and the wonder twins you probably already know but my tower.. There's space for everyone and I already dubbed it Avengers Tower.. I'm sure the old Captain wouldn't like Fury probing him and all that” _

_ By the end of his speech his voiced sounded small and weak, there was silence over the line and he was worried either he was ignored or the line went dead but then a soft sigh was heard. _

_ “Tony are you okay?” _

_ “I'm peachy Uncle..” _

_ “I know when you're lying.. But okay yea, I'll go and bring Steve with me. I miss you kid.. You know that right” _

_ “Y..yea.. S..so..” He got cut off and Bucky spoke in a soft tone, the last time he heard that tone was when he was small and Howard beat him for correcting a simple mistake.  _

_ “You do not need to apologize, not to me or anyone.. You didn't do anything wrong Tony, if it's anyone who should apologize it should be me.. I kept things from you and hurt you. And Tony.. This with Steve.. Will you be okay?” _

_ Ah the good Captain, he looked up at saw the plush staring at him from the workshop table and nodded, he reached out and grabbed the old worn thing and hugged it close to him, feeling a bit safer and nodded again, “yea.. I’ll deal with it Buck.. But just don't tell him about the plush or anything of my sob story”  _

_ “It isn't my place to tell” _

_ “Thank you Uncle” _

_ “I'll be there soon Tony” _

_ “Okay..” _

Soon was almost a week later but soon the tower was filled with the Avengers, the empty halls were filled with laughter and pranks. It was good, Tony wasn't alone anymore yet the nightmares continued and he was slowly growing tired of it all, “J? Where is the Captain?” 

“Captain Rogers is currently in the gym.. Shall I call him up?” 

“No, no.. No need to bother him, pull up the surveillance videos” 

He sighed as a large holographic screen appeared in front of him and there was videos of different angles of Steve working out in the gym he designed for them to use, his brown eyes watched how Steve looked  so focused on the punching bag as if he was punching his own nightmares away. Even now he admired the man, who woke  up in a different time and is doing okay, for the most part. Tony had to hand it to Steve for keeping a calm exterior. he sighed and waved his hand to close down the screens,he rubbed his hands over his face once again and let out a self-loathing laugh. “I have become a Stalker!” He turned his head to look at the plush and hugged it close before getting dressed In a loose sweatpants and a tank top before wandering down to the workshop, leaving the plush in his room.

 

***

 

“J..Jarvis.. Where’s Tony?” 

“Sir is currently in his workshop”

Steve looked up at the ceiling and nodded, he started to head down towards the elevator and let Jarvis take him down, on the trip down, he thought of the shorter brunette. They rarely had any interactions save for battle related but he hardly had a proper conversation with the man. It felt as if he was avoiding him and Steve wouldn't allow that. Ever since the Invasion he hadn’t had the chance to apologize for what he said. 

Once he reached the workshop he opened his mouth to ask to come on but Jarvis opened the door for him and he stepped in, the moment he walked into the tower he truly saw how much times has change, especially around Tony’s invention. He looked around in awe at all the parts laying around that would or wouldn’t end up being part of something when he felt a soft bump against his hand and he jumped slightly when he saw the claw type robot who whirred and beeped in curiosity. It bumped his hand and Steve smiled before petting the bots claw, it whirled and chirped happily when a voice to his right startled him, Tony stood there with grease covering his hands and cheek, some even got to his forehead and neck and Steve smiled, this was Tony in his nature and the shorter man laughed softly.

“That's Dum-e.. And those bots over there are Butterfingers and You” 

“Interesting names for your bots Tony”

“Yes, I can build things just don’t make me name them, I name what I see” he smiled amusingly and grabbed a rag to clean his hands, seeing as it was useless he tossed the rag aside.

“JARVIS is a good name though” Steve frowned as the look on Tony’s face fell, did he over step? 

“Well he’s different” Tony said as he turned around and cleared his throat, “so what do I owe the pleasure to Cap?” He said with a wave of his hand as we went back to work on a piece of armor. “I just wanted to see what you were doing Tony.. We don’t really talk”

“Well i’m a busy man, do you need an upgrade? You know just give an hour with your shield and I can make improvements to it”

Steve sighed and shook his head, “no Tony, it isn’t that I just wanted to talk to you.. I haven’t seen you around dinner or the common area, we’re starting to have movie nights and monopoly nights for team building” Tony looked up at Steve’s clear blue eyes and saw nothing but pure intentions there and he had to swallow a lump that formed in his throat. “I..I would love too but.. Like I said..busy man..” 

Steve shook his head and pressed on, “I promise It won’t be taking too much of your time, just a couple hours.. He team is really trying to catch me up on things.. Cause you Capsicle and all” the got a soft laugh from the brunnette and Steve smiled, he found out that it was easier to smile and relax in the 21st Century, his smile faltered when Tony rubbed his neck and bite his lip, Steve knew he was going to reject and before he could say anything the taller man stepped closer and placed a gentle hand on Tony’s shoulder, “Tony?” 

“I’m sorry Cap, Steve.. Steve.. I just can’t join you, I’m not worth it.. didn’t you say that once? On the Hellicarrier” Steve’s eyes widen as Tony looked guilty and took a hesitant step back, away from Steve’s touch and brought his left arm to rub his right, slowly sinking inside himself. Steve swallowed and reached out again to gently moved Tony towards the couch that was pushed up against the far wall and he sat next to him. 

“Tony, What I said back there. I… I didn’t mean any of it, I just. It all happened too fast the magic got the best of me” Steve rushed out and Tony looked down at his lap and Steve continued, “I’m so so sorry Tony, you are a superhero.. No matter what flaws you have, everyone has them, it’s what makes you human. Yes I read the files SHIELD gave me about you but boy was I wrong to think what I did. You are brilliant, strong, influential, bright, amazing and everything you went through.. Everything that had happened, you’re here as Iron Man. A superhero and a great man” 

Steve looked at Tony who continued to look down at his lap and he saw the brunette bite his lip and swallowing thickly, when he looked up at Steve he saw the man’s eyes were damp and Steve wanted to go back and hurt everyone that told Tony otherwise, he saw that he was going to say something when the Avenger’s alarm went off. It happened too quickly and Tony’s mask reappeared as he quickly rubbed his eyes and got up, he went over to one of his suits and Steve sighed softly, “Tony we’ll talk later.. Lets go save the city”  Tony just nodded and let the suit encase around him. 

The talk never came around. 

***

 

“I’m an idiot.. And Idiot” 

Tony sighed and looked at his plush as he rests his chin on his workshop desk and stared at the toy’s beady eyes, The battle was a simple one if he wasn’t wearing his suit, the EMP blast plucked him from the sky and he fell hard onto a rooftop, thankfully he came out of it unharmed but he still caused a commotion and saw a very worried Captain America who he quickly waved off and ran away once the suit opened up. He sighed again, it had been two days since the small battle but he did his best to avoid Steve from the overdue talk. The Workshop’s doors opened with a hiss and Tony sighed, he knew it wasn’t any of the team or Steve since they all went out for lunch, he wasn’t  jealous.. Not unti at all. 

“Tony?” 

He sighed and waved his hand slightly to show he was listening, Bucky walked over to him and placed a warm hand on his shoulder, it felt different than Steve’s touch, Bucky’s was much cooler but he wasn’t complaining, “hey Uncle” 

“What are you doing here? Everyone went out to lunch” Tony shrugged and pouted as he closed his eyes, his fingers poking at the plush. “Steve’s worried..” Bucky continued and Tony let the breath he was holding out, “he’s always worried..that’s nothing new..” 

“Tony…” the younger sighed and pulled back to sit up straighter, he pulled the plush closer to him in the processes and turned to look at his uncle, “it’s true, he is and it’s.. Um..” Bucky sighed and pulled up another stool and sat down, “he told me some bits and pieces and now you’re avoiding him even more now than before, why?” Tony closed his eyes and took deep breaths. “I know he’s different from the stories I told you..” Tony shook his head and looked at his uncle with such sad eyes, he never seen his nephew look so depressed and sad in a very long time, “No Uncle.. Its not that, Steve.. He’s perfect, too perfect he said things I always wanted to hear him say but my mind thinks  he’s just doing it to bond with the team or because of his overly righteousness ..but that’s wrong because he’s so perfect, so pure, filled with light and good.. And look at me Uncle… I’m full of darkness, death and destruction.. I can’t be around him, I’m afraid I’ll taint him or he’ll see that SHIELD was right about me, the me in those folders. I’m scared he’ll push me away, scared that  my childhood hero would see the real me, behind the Iron Man mask and say, no he’s not worth it.. If already said it once Uncle and I couldn’t take it, a part of me broke and I can’t hear those words again from him..” 

He hadn’t realized he was crying until he felt Bucky’s arms wrap around him, he was rocked gently and he buried his face against his uncle’s shoulder, no words were exchanged until Tony pulled back slowly and rubbed his eyes, “You  gonna talk to him? Don’t look at him as Captain America but as Steve Rogers. He’s a swell fella once you get to know him.. Okay? He won’t judge you” Tony nodded slowly and Bucky gripped the side of neck affectionately before pulling back, “you’re joining us tonight no buts. Got it kid?” He grinned and Tony nodded, Sir yes sir” 

***

 

Later that night, Tony made his way to the common area, with each step and the closer he got he felt nervous and he licked his lips trying to will himself to get calm. “Okay Tony you can do this, it’s just the Avengers.. You worked together, fight daily bad guys come on you can get in there” he pepped talked himself and lifted his head as he walked into the common area, he saw the team all sitting in front of the large t.v he installed. Steve, Bucky and Natasha taking up the couch, Thor on the floor Bruce on the arm chair and Clint sprawled out on the loveseat, he walked a bit closer and saw how comfortable everyone looked and he felt oddly out of place when Natasha looked up and quickly got up to meet him, her expression soft and she smiled softly, Tony stood still, shocked at the smile and Bucky soon joined her before nudging Tony softly and he nodded dumbly as the two turned and instead of heading back to the couch Natasha went over to the loveseat and pushed Clint off. 

“Hey! I was.. Oh Hey Stark!” He waved and moved to lay on the ground near Thor and both Bucky and Natasha took the unoccupied seat, leaving the couch the only place for Tony, Thor was too busy looking at the screen and Bruce gave him a soft smile as he walked to the couch, Steve looked up and his eyes widen before a smile broke out of his gorgeous face that Tony had to look away shyly and he took a seat. 

Throughout the movie Tony couldn’t concentrate, just feeling the warmth from the Captain he ended up scooting closer thankful that the man didn’t budge instead he draped his arm on the back of the couch, Soon Tony felt his eyelids  grow heavy from the sleepless nights and the warmth, the movie long forgotten in the background and he let himself fall asleep. 

He slowly woke up with whispers around him, yet his eyes felt so heavy that he just listened, “I don’t want to wake him Buck, he needs as much rest as he can..” Steve whispered and Bucky sighed softly, “I know.. But it’s late Steve” He felt something move and he cuddled closer to the warmth, remember he was sitting next to Steve, he must of fallen asleep on him, if he wasn’t so tired he would be a blushing mess but instead he just moved closer, “I..I’ll take him up Buck” after a moment of silence he felt the warmth pull away and he whined before gentle hands picked him, now if Tony was fully awake he would not allow such things but at the moment he just clung closer to Steve, his head resting on the others shoulder, he felt Steve chuckle softly and soon he was in his bed, he didn’t want to lose the warmth and he held on tightly to Steve anything after he didn’t remember as sleep overtook him. 

  
Tony woke up well rested and against the softest pillow he owned, he scrunched his face as he felt a heartbeat that wasn’t his own, and he snapped his eyes open coming face to face with a chest, his eyes traveled up to Steve’s peaceful face, his breath coming out soft and quiet, Tony felt his breath hitch and his cheeks heat up before he slowly pulled away, Steve’s arm was draped over his waist and Tony held back a whimper, he covered his mouth with his hand and felt tears weld up in his eyes, he looked around frantically thinking this was all a dream he looked at Steve again and reached out to gently move a strand of hair away from his face before he quickly got up and did what he did best, ran. 


End file.
